BIZARRE: Engaged friend cheated on boyfriend - What They Never Told You

Cheating is probably the worst thing that a partner can do to you. Still, infidelity is one of the most common reasons couples break up, even before marriage. According to a 2017 study, 40% of unmarried couples report infidelity. But what is a friend to do when they get mixed up in the drama?

This is the dilemma that this woman faced. She witnessed her friend cheating on her BF with some random dude and had to watch her get happily engaged a few days later. She couldn’t keep living with the boyfriend since she was the one who introduced them. So, she decided to tell him, but then uncovered a secret that ultimately ruined her friendship.

A woman saw her friend cheat on her BF and accept a marriage proposal a few days later

Image credits: Mizuno K/Pexels (not the actual photo)

When she confronted her about telling the truth, the friend begged her to keep her mouth shut

Image credits: MART PRODUCTION/Pexels (not the actual photo)

Image credits: RDNE Stock project/Pexels (not the actual photo)

Image credits: falalathrowaway201

More than half of people would tell their friends about a cheating partner

What makes friendships great is sharing secrets. Some of my best friends probably know things about me I’d never tell another living soul. Unfortunately, with that sometimes comes knowing secrets you’d rather not keep. Secrets about infidelity are of that kind.

Getting tangled up in someone else’s drama is rarely fun, at least for those who are not constant drama seekers and thrive on minding their own business. There are a lot of things to consider in a friendship dynamic. Would you tell a friend that they’re being cheated on? More importantly, would you rat out a friend for being unfaithful to their partner and risk losing said friend?

Each person would answer these questions differently. The author of this story chose to tell “Mason” about her friend “Kiana” cheating on him, and surveys show that people are more likely to tell than to keep such a secret.

Britons, for example, would be the most righteous. 53% would tell their friend that a partner is cheating on them, while only 15% would stay silent. In contrast, 59% of Americans would let their friend know about a cheating BF or GF, 17% would probably not tell, and 9% would definitely keep the secret.

However, this story is even more complicated because the author is a friend of both people in the couple. Fewer people would be willing to snitch on their friend if they were the cheater. Only 21% of Britons would break the bad news to their friends’ partners.

Whether or not to tell depends on what kind of person your friend is

Although it sounds very noble, it’s easier said than done. People who don’t tell their friends or their friends’ partners about cheating may not be bad people. They just might be afraid of the confrontation and the emotional consequences of the secret coming to light.

If the roles were reversed, many people would want to know if they were being cheated on. 75% of British people say they would want to know if their partner is unfaithful, and only 8% would rather stay in the dark. Perhaps some people just want as little drama in their lives as possible?

Age and duration of the relationship matter, too. It’s one thing to tell a 23-year-old that they’re girlfriend is cheating, but it’s completely different to break such news to a 58-year-old woman who spent 30 years in a marriage to her cheating husband.

Friends who face the dilemma of whether to tell or not to tell, experts recommend evaluating whether the friend will be better off knowing and whether they are the sort of person who would want to know.

Erika Labuzan-Lopez, LMFT, LPC, told Bustle that people have different attitudes toward cheating. However surprising this may sound to some, there are people who prefer not to know that a partner is cheating.

“Your friend may have strong reactions, have misplaced anger towards you, or pull away from you after you disclose what you know,” Labuzan-Lopez named the possible reactions. “These are not reasons not to tell your friend. But these are reactions that are normal. So you should be prepared.”

The friend felt morally obligated to tell the truth, but also wanted to mind her own business

Commenters sided with the woman and urged her to expose the lying cheater: “Please don’t let this guy ruin his life”

Finally, she decided to tell the boyfriend – her friend – the truth

After the cheater girlfriend found out, she confessed something that definitely meant the friendship was over

Image credits: Alena Darmel/Pexels (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Alena Darmel/Pexels (not the actual photo)

Image credits: RDNE Stock project/Pexels (not the actual photo)

Image credits: Gustavo Fring/Pexels (not the actual photo)

Image credits: falalathrowaway201

“We just talked about random things and he thanked me for all of my support,” the woman wrote in the last update

“At least now you both know the kind of person that K really is. Good riddance,” people reacted

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