From popular culture, we all remember very well that there are various sets of unofficial and sometimes unwritten rules for different communities of people and various occasions. Let's remember, for example, Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother with his bro code or those strict Fight Club rules (okay, okay, let's not tell anyone about Fight Club...)
But in any case, such codes most likely exist in real life. An example of making such a list is, let's say, a recent compilation in the AskWomen community, where the topic starter simply asked: "What girl code do you stick by?"
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1. Always give a girl in need a tampon, even if she’s your worst enemy
2. If she’s uncomfortable or seems creeped out by a guy, pretend you know her
3. Let her know if she has lipstick in her teeth
If I see a woman crying in the bathroom or whatever, I ask if they're OK. I always tell a woman I love her hair/ boots/ purse if I love it. I always let other women know if a stall is out of toilet paper before they go in.
"'Girl code' is the rules of being a woman, especially with regards to dating," the BBC website quotes Ellen Scott, Metro's Lifestyle Editor. "It's stuff like: you can't date your friend's ex, you also can't date your ex's friend. If you saw your friend's boyfriend cheating on them - you'd have to tell your friend. It's basically just that your loyalty is always with other women - that's what 'girl code' is supposed to be."
However, many people believe that in fact the 'girl code' goes far beyond relationships, and generally concerns the sphere of women's communication and interaction with each other and, importantly, their attitude toward themselves. At the very least, most of the opinions of women in our selection relate to a way wider area than love and relationships.
If she has put extra effort into her hair/clothes/makeup, I will stop to give a compliment. It takes 5 seconds to make someone's day that much better. And I always feel good when it happens to me. Women's compliments are less creepy than men's.
Just like bros before h**s, chicks before d!cks. If some guy is doing her wrong, I'm telling her, I don't care if I've known him my whole life, its girl code.
In addition to other stuff mentioned, there's a mom code. You have a crying baby and your hands are full? Hand me the baby. Ran out of diapers and I have a spare? I'll give it to you. Need someone to talk to your 3yo for a minute while you change the baby? No problem, I'm right there. I'm instantly alert to the signs of a distressed parent in public & try to always offer help, even if it's just to play perk a boo with a crabby kid for a minute as a distraction.
In fact, people like to make various sets of unwritten rules and advice. Our entire society is based on such concepts. The thinkers of the Enlightenment a few centuries ago created the theory of the so-called 'social contract' - that almost everything in our world: the state, the economy, private property, and so on, is a product of consent between people. Based on this theory, the 'girl code' is such precisely because women follow similar rules.
If you see someone hating on themselves, like really being mean to themselves, be kind and lift her up.
A kind sister, could change someone's life. May not be girl code, but there is something so amazing about hearing a woman older and wiser than you tell her that she is capable, amazing and some other compliment.
Woman code: Help lift each other up. Don't compete.
Any unwritten set of rules, for any community, is actually debatable, because what, for example, looked completely logical and absolutely correct a few decades ago, today may look strange and silly. Returning to How I Met Your Mother - yes, the series has acquired a cult status, but in our time, many jokes from there, and the very behavior of the characters sometimes look absolutely inappropriate.
And if you find a selection of old women's magazines, let's say, half a century ago, then many of the 'unconditional' rules of conduct of that time (yes, such collections were always and everywhere!) will definitely make us do some facepalming. Who knows, maybe this list will look weird in a few decades as well...
Don't know if this counts but if a guy calls his ex gf crazy or hysterical something in that area I make it my mission to find out her side
Whenever my guy buds get a girlfriend they are serious about, I always extend invites to her to do things. I never want any misunderstandings or any kind of competition so I am as respectful as I can be.
Also if we are at a party and my friend is drunk, I will not be letting her make the decision to go home with anyone other than close friends/family.
Build up other women at work. Saying things like "Sue" is great at spreadsheets, let's ask her for help. Or she has mad people skills, let's ask for her advice. Especially build up other women to management and to customers.
As in any collection of rules and advice, here you will find opinions on what should be done and what not. You will probably disagree with some of the judgments, and some of them look completely obvious. But that's what the Internet exists for, so that sometimes you can argue to your heart's content. So please feel free to scroll this list to the very end, discuss the most interesting and controversive points and add your own ones in case you have something to add.
Not giving out details about where they are/who they are with unless the girl herself gives permission for me to do it
I was put into early menopause by medication but I still carry around tampons in various sizes in my bag because I have been approached several times in the past by girls/ women who needed one urgently.
I'd think I look rather unapproachable (Heavy Metal fan with corresponding clothes and tattoos, also diagnosed anxiety/ introversion, etc.) But it still happens more often than I would ever have guessed
When around their partner, never behave in a way that will make your friend feel uncomfortable. Meaning… don’t be flirtatious for example.
If a girl asks me about a man I (have) know(n) because he’s questionable or does questionable things, I tell her what I know.
We go out together and we leave together. Nobody’s left unattended.
Embracing womanhood in the bathroom - be it helping a total stranger glue on her falsies then wishing her a fabulous evening, fetching the over turnt girlie some water, giving the heartbroken chick a genuine compliment & a cig...
Make sure your friends always have a designated driver to drive them home if they have been drinking.
Complimenting someone's outfit even if I don't like it, and especially when I think it took guts to wear it and she's looking for comments/validation (regardless of whether I think it's tasteful/looks pretty).
@Ginger...You got a point there. The only thing I would disagree with though: if you're a cis dude and you find yourself in need of a tampon I'd suggest a doc visit stat.
Load More Replies...When you drop someone, anyone off at their home, wait until you see them actually open the front door and turn a light on or wave goodnight to you. If they’ve lost their keys, their keys don’t work and their phone battery is flat, or a myriad of other stuff that’ll ‘cause an issue, you sitting and waiting 30 seconds to make sure they get in safely will save a whole load of issues. It’s a small thing but it’ll keep your loved ones safe 😀😀❤️
@Ginger...You got a point there. The only thing I would disagree with though: if you're a cis dude and you find yourself in need of a tampon I'd suggest a doc visit stat.
Load More Replies...When you drop someone, anyone off at their home, wait until you see them actually open the front door and turn a light on or wave goodnight to you. If they’ve lost their keys, their keys don’t work and their phone battery is flat, or a myriad of other stuff that’ll ‘cause an issue, you sitting and waiting 30 seconds to make sure they get in safely will save a whole load of issues. It’s a small thing but it’ll keep your loved ones safe 😀😀❤️
