Writing a captivating piece takes way more than putting pen to paper. The author spends countless hours developing the plot, writing and rewriting it, crossing out hundreds of unnecessary lines, and doing the research—lots and lots of it. Some writers could work more on the two, wiping out some of the information or researching it better. Otherwise, they might end up being shamed for some of their inaccurate, unrealistic, or plain foolish lines. As these male writers depicting female characters did.
The subreddit “Men Writing Women” is dedicated, as the description suggests, to “how men who create films, books, TV, and graphic novels characterize women”. Members of the community clearly don’t shy away from sharing their finds, and we have gathered some of their best examples into this list today. If you feel like it’s too short, check out our previous pieces about “Men Writing Women” here and here.
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Who Doesn't Love To Bleed And Writhe In Pain Once A Month?
Jane Goodall Should Just Go Ape S*it
“Let Them Puppies Free!”
A Jack of all trades is a master of none, they say. That rings true, as there’s hardly a person who knows the ins and outs of every subject out there. And writers are no exception; no matter how well-read they are, writing about specific topics usually requires specific knowledge, which they might not have.
Similarly, writing about certain groups of people calls for knowing what they might be like. Or the basics of their anatomy, at least, if that’s what’s important for the story. Otherwise, you might end up sounding ludicrous to those who have a better understanding of the topic, not to mention the experts.
[clans Of The Alphane Moon By Philip K. Dick] How To Assert Your Dominance Over Other Women: Scare Their Nipples Off
What Else Could A Woman Want After Coming Out Of A Coma? Beyond The Darkness (1979)
Grammar Factory suggested a rule of thumb for doing enough research for your writing. According to them, you should analyze it enough to be able to write your first draft with no holes, without it becoming a reason to put off the writing process itself.
In his book, ‘On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft’, Steven King pointed out that even though the research shouldn’t outshine the story itself (well, unless it’s a research paper you’re working on), it’s crucial for fixing any possible errors in the story and adding some credible details.
Scientology, A New Slant On Life - By L. Ron Hubbard (1965)
Til That I, A Virgin, Have At Least One Kid. (Once Gone, By Blake Pierce)
I’d Like To Imagine This Was Done For The Male Characters As Well
In order to avoid sounding foolish, you can always turn for help to experts or outside sources that are brimming with factual information. Grammar Factory emphasized just that by suggesting using books, the internet, or expert interviews as ways of researching information for your book.
In Death, I Hope All My Friends Remember Me For My Great Rack [1q84, Haruki Murakami]
I’m Surprised No One Has Posted This Guy Yet?? From Jpod By Douglas Coupland
How To Kiss A Girl…sure
Unless it’s total fiction you’re writing about, fact-checking is important. Certain claims made by authors can raise disputes, or have consequences bigger than being cited in a certain subreddit. The author Lisa Bickmore pointed out that when a writer wants to use factual material, it’s also crucial they find good, quality information. Not only that, it’s vital to present it in a way that’s understandable to the reader.
Women Have Useless Faces (A Happy Death By Camus)
(Tw: Physical Violence) [nana By Zola] Zola's Nana, Or How To Stop Worrying And Learn To Love Physical Abuse
The Amount Misogyny In This One Was A Bit Shocking. The Lake Of The Dead By André Bjerke
Despite being important to the integrity of the piece, facts can be too much for some readers. Unless it’s a manual—in which case, you know what you’re getting yourself into as a reader—having to deal with an abundance of detailed information can get tiresome or even boring for the regular bookworm.
Hell's Angels By Hunter S Thompson. Men In The 1960s Just Understood Women, You Know?
There Are Many Different Types Of Arm Folds, I'm Glad Robert Cleared That Up For Me
Liana Finck, Women In Literature, 2022
In order to prevent the prospect of tiring out the reader, writers often turn to a more detailed, exciting way of writing. That in itself is not a bad idea at all; however, it’s important not to go overboard with such embellishments.
Some of the examples on this list, for instance, describe certain characters in a detailed way, which is simply incorrect. That’s when facts can turn against the writer, and make them the butt of the joke at times.
Ah Yes, The Kind Of Giggles That Spill From Your Breasts. Of Course The Girl Is “Just Turned 16” As Well. (Hospital By Han Song)
That Natural Womanly Instinct To Love Cooking (Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep? By Philip K Dick)
"But Whatever" (The Night Shift, Alex Finlay)
Other examples in the “Men Write Women” collection portray women in a way that is not factually correct, nor amusing. They are often based on stereotypes, which can be offensive to some female representatives, or emphasize certain “truths” that not a lot of them would agree to, such as the “magnificent uselessness of a woman’s face”, for instance.
Lake Of The Dead By André Bjerke
Lots To Unpack Here [the Road Back By Erich Maria Remarque]
I’m Sorry, What?!? The Body Keeps The Score By Bessel Van Der Kolk
Certain views towards women in these snippets are not only displeasing but outdated as well. They often sound like something from the 19th century—the time when gender bias was so strong, some women authors chose to write under male pseudonyms. (George Eliot, who was actually Mary Ann Evans, or George Sand, a.k.a. Amantine Lucile Aurore Dupin, just to name a couple.)
Breast Roll By "It's Kind Of A Funny Story" By Ned Vizzini
Nod By Adrian Barnes
"A Fine Porch Door"... From The Stand By Stephen King
I Feel Christopher Pike’s Spellbound Could Fit
Coast To Coast Murders, James Patterson
The Immortalists By Chloe Benjamin. A Genuinely Good Book With The Worst First Paragraph!
Go Home Everyone About To Post Stephen King. Alizee Yeezy Has Trumped All Of You
Poet Fundamentally Misunderstands Women
From The Pictorial 1952
Because This Is What A Female Psychologist Would Think When Dealing With A Paranoid Schizophrenic Violent Patient. Domain, Steve Alten
The River Between By Ngugi Wa Thiong'o
“Her Breasts Quivered With Excitement” Really??? (Sales Pitch By Philip K. Dick)
Nietzsche Going At It (Beyond Good And Evil)
I Hate It When I Am Unfemininely Crisp And Therefore Less Attractive Than I Could Be To My Male Coworkers. (Brain Wave, Poul Anderson)
Many Thanks To Kobo Abe For Explaining The Female Condition In His Classic Novel ‘The Woman In The Dunes’
Women As Baby Producers... (Slaughterhouse Five By Kurt Vonnegut)
My Friend Sent This To Me: It Starts Out Awful And Only Gets Worse. [zadie Smith, White Teeth]
Chuck Palahnuik- The Invention Of Sound
The High Auction By Misba (Literally The 2nd Page)
Second Reference To Her Oversized Bazungas In As Many Paragraphs - Paternus By Dyrk Ashton
Arthur C Clarke - Rendezvous With Rama (1973). What Norton Says Here Is Really Stupid, But It Seems Like Clarke Knows This
This Makes Me Prefer Men Writing About Women's Breasts (Bellevue Square By Michael Redhill)
Asked A Text Ai (Link In Comments) To Write A Women Written By A Man
"All Women Are Deeply Ashamed Of Their Periods." - Ross Anderson (Book Is Security Engineering, 2010)
From Sartre's Nausea
We Can Remember It For You Wholesale (Total Recall) - Philip K. Dick. Aka: Sometimes Even Your Favourite Authors Fail
From "Carolina Moonset" By Matt Goldman. Where Did The Firehose Come From?
The Waste Lands (Dark Tower III) By Stephen King
It’s Not Like I Expect Much From Certain Erotic Genres, But This Was Such Classic R/Menwritingwomen It Made Me Laugh. Mahoushi Teria To Tiken Na Iraisho By Mtd
“Cell” By Stephen King. You’re In A Zombie Apocalypse But You’re Worried About…what?
Oh The Humanity! From House Of Leaves, By Mark Danielewski
"Dogfight" By William Gibson And Michael Swanwick
‘Twitching By Numbers’ By Garry Bagnell, A Memoir Of His Anecdotes About Birdwatching, Published In This Very Year 2022. Insert Joke About Tits Here, But Seriously This Is Why Women Still Feel So Unwelcome In The Birding Community
I Love This Series And I Am A Fan Of King, But 🙄🙄🙄 [the Waste Lands (Book III Of The Dark Tower Series), Stephen King]
Catch And Cradle By Katia Rose. Written By A Woman, But I Still Thought This Line Would Find A Place Here
One Mention Of “Undulating Breasts” In A Book Is One Too Many [satan: His Psychotherapy And Cure By The Unfortunate Dr. Kassler, J.s.p.s. By Jeremy Leven]
This Is How I Plan To Introduce Myself From Now On
Apparently The Protagonist Got All Of Her Talent From Her Dad, But Her Mother Gave Her Was 'Pluck' And "Tangerine Breast," From Tom Robbins' Skinny Legs And All
“They Are Overwhelmed With Thinking And Doing…”
Coma By Robin Cook
Boobs Ahoy! The Heart Of Man-Jin Kalman Stefansson
[heretics Of Dune By Frank Herbert] I Wonder How One Would Master The Three Hundred Steps Of Orgasmic Amplification
Thomas Jefferson To William Fleming, March 20, 1764, "11. O’clock At Night," Papers, 1:16
From “A Cornucopia Of Dunderheads” By John Kennedy Toole, Jr
Her Breasts Did What? The Cloud Sculptor Of Coral -D, By J.g.ballard
I Know This Is More Men Designing Women, But The Costume For The First Female Version Of Spider-Man Is… Something
[six Feet Under Par By Brent Norwalk/The Good Place By Micheal Schur] Found This Gem On The Wiki
From The Rising Tide By Sam Lloyd. Anyone Got That Seal Skin Routine?
What's That Going By? Just A Pair Of Legs. [the Bat By Jo Nesbø]
“Something Wicked This Way Comes” By Ray Bradbury. This Is A Lot Less Sinister Than Some Other Posts Here But Still! I Guess Only Men Get Existential Dread At 3 Am
Stephen King - The Shining
Because Daughters Flirt With Their Fathers From Birth (Last Orders By Graham Swift)
Is This Really The Best Description He Could Come Up With? (The Crimson Petal And The White By Michael Farber)
Will Haunt You By Brian Kirk. It Will Haunt You 🤢
Absolute Fanasty (American Gods - Neil Gaiman)
From The Duel, A Short Story By Kaiko Takeshi
Interesting… (Feed, M.t Anderson)
Men Writing… String Orchestra Instruments? (Setup And Repair Of The Double Bass For Optimum Sound By Chuck Traeger)
Prodigious Jugs [dreamcatcher By Stephen King]
Describing A Woman That Looks Good For “Breeding”, And Another Woman That Looks Like A Pastry, In The Same Paragraph - “Darkfall” By Dean Koontz
Considering How Many Girls Fall In Love With Horses At Age 6-8, This Creeps Me Out Bigly (The Diana Chronicles By Tina Brown)
Male Author Who Doesn't Understand Women Assumes Men Are Just Incapable Of Understanding Women [fulgrim, Graham Mcneill]
Investigator Arrives At The Crime Scene Where A Woman Has Been Murdered And Begins To Imagine Her With Her Killer [i Am Pilgrim By Terry Hayes]
The Shape Of Water - Andrea Camilleri
I Wonder If The Author Ever Actually Talked To A Woman
This Man Need His Book Publishing Rights Taken Away
For The Lactose Intolerant Reader
Dear Juliet: Letters From The Lovestruck And Lovelorn To Shakespeare's Juliet In Verona - Giulio Tamassia
She’s Exhausted After Work, But Because She Senses Hubby Wants Sex, She Does Too. The Consultant By Bentley Little
To Contrast The Other Post About Nausicaa, Here's Hayao Miyazaki Discussing His Thoughts About Her Chest
All Of This About Someone Else’s Wife 💀 (The Sympathizer By Viet Thanh Nguyen)
The Croaning By Laird Barron. Ps: Anthropologists Dont Cry
[the Warlock In Spite Of Himself -- Christopher Stasheff] The 28 Year Old Mc's "Dream" Girl. Her Age Is Unclear But She's Been Described As Child-Like More Than Once. Eesh
I Burst Out Laughing At "Inching Breastward" [the Boatman's Daughter By Andy Davidson]
"Childlike" -James Herbert, The Survivor. 😭🤮
Good Eve, Fair Females! After Reading That Sesquipedalianism Is Arousing, I Ask That You Please Form An Orderly Queue Instead Of Throwing Yourselves At Me. Perchance. (*a Dark Matter* By Peter Straub)
Absolute Power By David Baldacci
Always About The Breasts. Home By Harlan Coben
Sister Talks About Her Brother’s Physique For Way Too Many Sentences, Arthur C Clarke In Songs Of Distant Earth
Wow Sounds Pretty Accurate (Naked By David Sedaris)
Possession By A. S. Byatt - Watch Out, The Mean Feminists Boo Women With Nice Hair!
Almost Black By Vijay Chokalingam😟
Men Emojiing Women
Ok I've Been Really Enjoying Finally Reading Initial D But What The F**k Is This
I Think She Could've Grabbed The Fallen Soldier's Camo Or Vest. Cold Wouldn't Bother Her, But Bullets Would, Regardless How Durable She Is. [project Hyperion, Jeremy Robinson]
Totally Normal Assumption To Make... [gauss: Titan Of Science By G. Waldo Dunnington]
Philip K. Dick Posthumously Published Work Gather Yourselves Together
[mating Males An Evolutionary Perspective On Mammalian Reproduction By Tim Glover] From What He Has Heard From Many Ladies
The Stepford Wives, Ira Levin
A Necessary Detail (Peach Blossom Paradise By Ge Fei)
Sightseeing By Rattawut Lapcharoensap
Paulo Coelho's 'The Alchemist' - Half Way Through And I'm Not Sure It'll Pass The Bechdel Test
"Sturdy Nipples" In The Erstwhile By B. Catling
Just As I Suspected- No Woman Came Up With “Lovely Lady Lumps”
Exerpt From Champion Of Luck By Charles Kirkman: A Harem Comedy Based On Japanese Mythology, Anime, And Videogames
This Is The Main Character Mitchell Talking About His Nine Year Old Daughter. I'm Concerned. (Me And Mrs. Jones By Linda Cajio)
I Don't Think That's Quite What "Glowing" Means... From "Little Bee" By Chris Cleave
*sigh* She Even Repeats It (Super Danganronpa 2: Goodbye Despair)
Killing Commendatore By Murakami Again… 12yos Do Not Ask Older Men About This…
Too Horny To Think About The Aftermath Of 9/11 (Iain Banks - Dead Air)
[angels & Demons By Dan Brown] He Almost Got Through The Whole Descriptor Paragraph Without Mentioning Breasts
The Ice Twins By S. K. Tremayne. Did Not Realize The Author Was A Man Until I Made It To The End Of The First Page
If Any Of You Women Are Having Trouble Measuring Your Womanly Feelings
My boobs must lead a double life. I've never seen them behave like these men describe them.
TLDR: Breasts, breasts, breasts, breasts, women quite like rape, breasts, breasts, women talk too much, breasts, breasts, women are stupid, breasts, breasts, breasts.
My boobs must lead a double life. I've never seen them behave like these men describe them.
TLDR: Breasts, breasts, breasts, breasts, women quite like rape, breasts, breasts, women talk too much, breasts, breasts, women are stupid, breasts, breasts, breasts.
